The basis of optimism is sheer terror.

Always forgive your enemies, nothing annoys them so much.

Fathers should be neither seen nor heard. That is the only proper basis for family life.

All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That’s his.

I like men who have a future and women who have a past.

Education is an admirable thing, but it is well to remember from time to time that nothing that’s worth knowing can be taught.

The advantage of the emotions is that they lead us astray.

In this world there are only two tragedies: One is not getting what one wants, and the second is getting it.

I hope you have not been leading a double life, pretending to be wicked, and being really good all the time. That would be hypocrisy.

Duty is what one expects from others.